When I went to UCSC, it gave narrative course evaluations, not grades (unless you asked for grades). I wrote some fake course evaluations for myself and put them up on my dorm wall, wondering if I would fool anybody. I made sure they looked like evaluations: the big Xerox 8700 laser printer on which almost all official University printouts are done was available for student use, so it was trivial to print evaluations that looked just like the real thing. All I had to do was fold them, staple them, and then rip out the staples (to emulate being mailed across campus).
Writing 1, Composition and Rhetoric, is the one course that nearly everybody on campus has to take (although I tested out of it), UCSC's equivalent to first-year English. The other course was a "College Zero" course for which I had written a fake course review in the 1990 Course Review.
I don't know if I fooled anybody with the evaluations, but when I faked a recommendation letter from Chancellor Pister (using the stationary template thoughtfully provided on the University local area network, and leaving a blank signature area) and put that up on my wall, somebody wrote on it that I should not be such a damned show-off (even though one of the reasons "Chancellor Pister" gave for why I was so wonderful was that I was so very good at forging recommendation letters).
UNIVERSITY OF CALIFORNIA OFFICE OF THE REGISTRAR WINTER 89 NARRATIVE COURSE EVALUATION 4-18-89 PRIVEN, AARON ROSS WRIT 1 SEC.12 CB# 0078 999323216 (89362) MERRILL (HIS ) COMP AND RHET ADVISOR: INSTRUCTOR: LIKE, W. --INSTRUCTOR EVALUATION: Like, okay, you know, Aaron's work was like acceptable in this class, but like you have to understand that he was like so totally pissed off all the time that he was like a total pain to deal with in class, you know? I mean, like, really, you know, I had to come to class and deal with like nineteen other people and you know Aaron just insisted that like I pay attention to like everything he said, right, and that just like isn't fair to like anyone else, you know? He kept saying stuff like "I don't believe the correction you're making is in line with the accepted rules of English grammar" and "I don't see why you believe that the imposition of catchphrases is helpful to comprehension of the paragraph" whenever I like tried to help other students like be more free with their writing, like you know? Okay. So, like, anyway, so Aaron's writing was like acceptable, but you know he like totally refused to accept that like good writing was writing that like read well out loud, you know? Aaron is like totally filled with the idea that like good writing means big words and like complete total formality. I mean, really, like ugh, you know? But, you know, they weren't like totally awful, and they were like understandable if you didn't actually like spend too much time with them. Anyway, Aaron can like pass the class, okay?
UNIVERSITY OF CALIFORNIA OFFICE OF THE REGISTRAR WINTER 90 NARRATIVE COURSE EVALUATION 7-28-92 PRIVEN, AARON ROSS ZERO 23C SEC.01 CB# 0310 999323216 (23273) MERRILL (MODS) INTER DECOR DORMS ADVISOR: INSTRUCTOR: CEPTOR, P. (SS) --- COURSE DESCRIPTION: This course, Praxis in Interior Decoration: Dormitories, provided an introduction to the interior decoration of dormitory rooms. Lectures and discussion sections were used, as well as extensive work in laboratory facilities. Students were evaluated on two short essays, written laboratory exercises, and a final project. Students were expected to fully furnish and decorate (using University- provided furniture as a base) their own dormitory rooms as their final project; special laboratory rooms were provided for off-campus students. --INSTRUCTOR EVALUATION: Although he showed an excellent understanding of the theory behind the work, his laboratory work and final project were no better than fair. While he has a good understanding of the important principle of controlled chaos in dormitory rooms, his chaos is never fully controlled and often is overpowering, especially with regard to the overuse of milk crates (21 in his final project). Aaron seems to prefer informative rather than decorative wall hangings (i.e., maps), which contradicts an important residential principle. Moreover, Aaron's arrogant tone and flippant attitude diminished the value of the course for other students and nearly forced me to remove him from the class. However, two excellent essays, one on the division of room space in triple rooms and a brilliant essay on various methods of elevating beds ensure that I cannot in good conscience refuse to pass him. Overall, Aaron's work in this class was acceptable.
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